As Parents, We Sometimes…

~ fancypaperblog

Parenting styles and choices are as varied as political opinions. They are as paradoxically judged and supported, divisive and strengthening as these same political opinions.

It is almost impossible to be right. It is always probable to be wrong.

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Hard on yourself much?

This is what I think.

As a parent we sometimes …

…question ourselves.

…pat ourselves on the back.

…wonder what we are doing wrong.

Sometimes we use the toilet…

…for peace and quiet.

To eat a Mars bar.

Because we need to.

Sometimes we stay quiet in the face of challenge.bitmoji-20170607115404

Take the moral high ground.

Sometimes we call out the stranger who commented on our child and maybe call that stranger a dick.

Sometimes we lose the baby  weight.

Sometimes we don’t.

Sometimes we can wear the same jeans that we wore when we were 17.

Sometimes we spot sixty year old ladies wearing the same Next top as us.

Sometimes we care about that.

Sometimes we don’t.

Sometimes we are honest.

Sometimes we put on a front.

Sometimes we talk about the toddler’s tantrum.

Sometimes we pretend they don’t tantrum.golf-1372528_640

Sometimes we tantrum ourselves.

Sometimes we breast feed.

Sometimes we bottle feed.

We always feed our children. Usually.

Sometimes we care about how our house looks.

Sometimes we don’t.

Sometimes we use discount branded nappies.baby-22199_640

Sometimes we use cloth.

Sometimes we buy Pampers.

We all change nappies and wipes bums.

Sometimes our babies teethe at night.

Sometimes they teethe in the day.

Usually, they all get teeth.

Sometimes we make soup and pies from scratch.

Sometimes we open a tin of pasta hoops.

Sometimes we cry.

Sometimes we laugh.

Sometimes we want people nearby.

Sometimes we want solitude.

Sometimes we feel judged by other people.cartoon-parents-008

Sometimes we are the ones judging.

The bullied and the bullies. Sometimes we are both.

Sometimes we yearn for shopping trips alone, Starbucks and a scone.

Sometimes we get there and are lonely for our little ones.

Sometimes we want to go running in the evening.

Sometimes we want Aeros and Poldark.

(Sometimes we never want go running but always want Aeros and Poldark).

Sometimes we get post natal depression.

Sometimes we don’t.

We all have our highs and lows.

Sometimes we have support nearby.

Sometimes we don’t.

Sometimes we are just doing it alone.

Sometimes we empty the dishwasher.

Sometimes we ignore the dishwasher.

Sometimes we kick the dishwasher.

Sometimes other parents and their discussions are a great help.

Sometimes other parents and their opinions are unwanted.

Sometimes other parents and their opinions are insightful.

Sometimes other parents and their opinions are fabricated.

Sonetimes we see doctors.

Sonetimes we get vaccinations.

Sonetimes we don’t.natural-medicine-1738161_640

Sometimes we believe in homeopathy.

Sometimes we don’t.

Sometimes we use books.

Sometimes we Google.

Sometimes we don’t.

Sometimes we grow our own vegetables.

Sometimes we buy them from Lidl.

Sometimes we barely use them at all.

Sometimes we go to McDonalds.

Sometimes we fear our children’s independent attitudes.

Sometimes we glory in it.

Sometimes we check the door lock ten times.

Sometimes we wash our hands over and over.

Sometimes we barely wash our children’s faces because they won’t let us.

Sometimes we hurriedly lick off the porridge stuck on their cheek.

Sometimes we bathe them nightly.

Sometimes we get up and give our older children bottles of milk in the night.

Sometimes we don’t.

Sometimes we toilet train at age two.

Sometimes at age three.

Sometimes they are four.

Sometimes new studies reveal that toilet training is genetic and when they are ready it will be easy.

Sometimes new studies reveal something that makes us feel a little bit worse about ourselves.

Sometimes new studies reveal something that makes us feel vindicated.

Either way,  there will always be new studies revealing something.

Sometimes we plan to have another child.

Sometimes we don’t.

Outsiders should never ask!

Sometimes we conceive naturally. 

Sometimes we need help.

Sometimes it is easy.

Sometimes it is horribly difficult.

Sometimes we adopt.

Sometimes we foster.

They are all our loved ones.

Or they should be.

Sometimes we hear dreadful horror stories about parenting gone wrong.

Sometimes this makes us feel weak with terror.

Sometimes we can deal with these feelings.

Sometimes we need some help.

Sometimes we have meltdowns over dusty shelves.

Sometimes we hire a cleaner.

Sometimes we are the cleaner.

Sometimes we have large spaces to clean.

Sometimes we wish for large spaces to clean.

Sometimes we have our children living with us.

Sometimes we aren’t that lucky.

Sometimes the sound of a soother falling, that thud to the floor, makes us sigh.

Sonetimes we don’t use soothers.

Sometimes our child wears five soothers to bed on her fingers, like Cruella Deville’s diamond rings.

Sometimes it is the parent they soothe.

Sometimes our hearts drop when any baby starts to cry.

Sometimes our hearts lift at the piercing howl, as Sylvia Plath said ‘clear vowels rise like balloons’.

Sometimes we feel like Sylvia Plath.

Sometimes we feel like Old Mother Hubbard.

Sometimes we feel like Pioneer Woman.

Sometimes we feel anxious.

Sometimes we feel content.

Do we ever feel like a Perfect Parent?

I am yet to meet such a wonder.

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I too am such a duck!

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43 thoughts on “As Parents, We Sometimes…”

  4. I absolutely love this. It’s so true. We are all different but can one decision be a wrong one? I have a clean tidy house but would never use cloth nappies. That’s just me. I get why people don’t mind a little mess, some battles aren’t worth fighting. For me that one is. I get why people opt for cloth nappies. It just wasn’t for me. I don’t think I’m more perfect for those choices. Just different than, perhaps the lady at number 20 down the road. Thank you for joining us at #fortheloveofBLOG

    Liked by 1 person

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  10. You hit the nail on the head with every single thing you said, who are we you say which is right and which is wrong, all we are doing is trying to do our best. Brilliant post! Nicky xx #bigpinklink

    Liked by 1 person

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  12. This is great, a very comprehensive list which shows the complexities of parenting. We are all stronger if we support one another. #bigpinklink

    Liked by 1 person

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  19. I really did my best, but no. We look back after the fact and can’t alter the things we learned were wrong. Hindsight would be my chosen super power along with my cape and knickers.
    I think we all do the same as Mothers, parents and carers … our very best.

    Liked by 1 person

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